Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Indian brain....

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
This is not a story but a true incident that happened in USA.*
An Indian man walked into a bank in New York City one day and asked for
the loan officer.

He told the loan officer that he was going to India on business for two
weeks and needed to borrow $5,000.

The bank officer told him that the bank would need some form of
security for the loan. The Indian man handed
over the keys to a new Ferrari parked on the street in front of the
bank. He produced the title and everything
checked out.

The loan officer agreed to accept the car as collateral for the loan.

The bank's president and its officers all enjoyed a good laugh at the
Indian for using a $250,000 Ferrari as
collateral against a $5,000 loan.
An employee of the bank then drove the Ferrari into the bank's
underground garage and parked it there.

Two weeks later, the Indian returned, repaid the $5,000 and the
interest, which came to $15.41.

The loan officer said, "Sir, we are very happy to have had your
business, and this transaction has worked out very
nicely, but we are a little puzzled. While you were away, we checked
you out and found that you are a multi
millionaire. What puzzles us is, why would you bother to borrow
"$5,000"

The Indian replied: "Where else in New York City can I park my car for
two weeks for only $15.41 and expect it to be there when I return'"

Ah, the brain of the Indian... This is why India is shining . . .

Sunday, April 26, 2009

MIRACLES ARE YOUR RESPONSIBILITY!!!!

I found a very good article as i was surfing some pages. This is the he original link to it . and this is the article. It talks about creating miracals in our lives.

You have a responsibility to create miracles in your own life. The responsibility lies on your shoulders. You can’t blame anyone else, and you can’t look outside of yourself for someone else to create the miracles for you. In this article, I’m going to break down the word “Miracle”, because each of you have a responsibility. As you know, my Why is to impact others and change the world one heart at a time. As you read this today, my goal is for you to take responsibility and realize that you have the innate ability to create miracles. So let’s get started!

The letter “M” means Momentum, which is created by you. You must create Momentum in your life for yourself, for your Why, for your family, for your success, for your ļ¬nances, for your health...YOU create Momentum! No one else will do it for you. You aren’t a surfer waiting for the next wave to come in. You and only you must create your own Momentum to drive you toward creating your Miracle!

The letter “I” stands for Incentive. You must have something inciting you to action...your ultimate “Why”. Why are you doing what you are doing? Why do you want to begin that business? An Incentive builds the foundation that keeps you focused on your Miracle. No doubt about it! But again, it is your responsibility to determine what your incentive is and how it will drive you toward your Miracle.

The letter “R” stands for Revelation. As you read this today, get a Revelation! It’s your responsibility...no one else’s. It doesn’t matter who you are, where you came from, how much money you have...get a Revelation. YOU can and will create Miracles!

The letter “A” stands for Action. I know you’ve heard this before, but read this today, print it out and decide that you are going to take Action to create Miracles. Take the Action that you know that you need to take to create your Miracle.

The letter “C” stands for Commitment. Finally...once and for all...dive right into it...get Committed to your Miracle! It’s your responsibility. Inside you is a reason for why you are here...
your Miracle...so Commit to it. Go for it!

The letter “L” stands for Love. You must Love what you do. You must Love the Miracle that you are focused on creating. If your Miracle is all about money...you will fail! Your Miracle cannot be based on money. Your Miracle must be based on what you can do to impact the
world, which will produce everlasting results. You will produce true Miracles! Don’t let anyone else tell you what you must do for money. Love what you do and create your own Miracles.

The letter “E” stands for Energy. Your gonna need Energy to create your Miracle. There’s no such thing as it “falling in your lap”, “luck” or “winning the lotto” in a success mindset. It takes hard work! You need the Energy to take those daily action steps to create your Miracle. It is your responsibility to maintain your Energy to create your Miracle.

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

The Great Taxing Indian Red Tape.

Some one Help me on TAX..........

1) Qus. : What are you doing?

Ans. : Business.

Tax : PAY PROFESSIONAL TAX!

2) Qus. : What are you doing in Business?

Ans. : Selling the Goods.

Tax : PAY SALES TAX!!

3) Qus. : >From where are you getting Goods?

Ans. : From other State/Abroad

Tax : PAY CENTRAL SALES TAX, CUSTOM DUTY & OCTROI!

4) Qus. : What are you getting in Selling Goods?

Ans. : Profit.

Tax : PAY INCOME TAX!

5) Qus. : How do you distribute profit ?

Ans : By way of dividend

Tax : Pay dividend distribution Tax

6) Qus. : Where you Manufacturing the Goods?

Ans. : Factory.

Tax : PAY EXCISE DUTY!

7) Qus. : Do you have Office / Warehouse/ Factory?

Ans. : Yes

Tax : PAY MUNICIPAL & FIRE TAX!

8) Qus. : Do you have Staff?

Ans. : Yes

Tax : PAY STAFF PROFESSIONAL TAX!

9) Qus. : Doing business in Millions?

Ans. : Yes

Tax : PAY TURNOVER TAX!

Ans : No

Tax : Then pay Minimum Alternate Tax

10) Qus. : Are you taking out over 25,000 Cash from Bank?

Ans. : Yes, for Salary.

Tax : PAY CASH HANDLING TAX!

11) Qus.: Where are you taking your client for Lunch & Dinner?

Ans. : Hotel

Tax : PAY FOOD & ENTERTAINMENT TAX!

12) Qus.: Are you going Out of Station for Business?

Ans. : Yes

Tax : PAY FRINGE BENEFIT TAX!

13) Qus.: Have you taken or given any Service/s?

Ans. : Yes

Tax : PAY SERVICE TAX!

14) Qus.: How come you got such a Big Amount?

Ans. : Gift on birthday.

Tax : PAY GIFT TAX!

15) Qus.: Do you have any Wealth?

Ans. : Yes

Tax : PAY WEALTH TAX!

16) Qus.: To reduce Tension, for entertainment, where are you going?

Ans. : Cinema or Resort.

Tax : PAY ENTERTAINMENT TAX!

17) Qus.: Have you purchased House?

Ans. : Yes

Tax : PAY STAMP DUTY & REGISTRATION FEE !

18) Qus.: How you Travel?

Ans. : Bus

Tax : PAY SURCHARGE!

19) Qus.: Any Additional Tax?

Ans. : Yes

Tax : PAY EDUCATIONAL, ADDITIONAL EDUCATIONAL & SURCHARGE ON ALL THE CENTRAL GOVT.'s TAX !!!

20) Qus.: Delayed any time Paying Any Tax?

Ans. : Yes

Tax : PAY INTEREST & PENALTY!

21) INDIAN :: can i die now??

Ans :: wait we are about to launch the funeral tax!!!

Monday, April 13, 2009

A Teaching Story - Good Fable

Buddha, one day, was in deep thought about the worldly activities and the
ways of instilling goodness in human beings.
One of his disciples approached him and said humbly "Oh my teacher ! While
you are so much concerned about the world and others, why don't you look in to the welfare and needs of your own disciples also."
Buddha: "OK.. Tell me how I can help you"
Disciple: "Master! My attire is worn out and is beyond the decency to wear
the same. Can I get a new one, please?"
Buddha found the robe indeed was in a bad condition and needed replacement.
He asked the store keeper to give the disciple a new robe to wear on. The
disciple thanked Buddha and retired to his room.

A while later, he went to his disciple's place and asked him "Is your new attire comfortable? Do you need anything more?"
Disciple: "Thank you my Master. The attire is indeed very comfortable. I
need nothing more"
Buddha: "Having got the new one, what did you do with your old attire?"
Disciple: "I am using it as my bed spread"
Buddha: "Then.. hope you have disposed off your old bed spread"
Disciple: " No.. no.. master. I am using my old bedspread as my window
curtain"
Buddha: " What about your old Curtain?"
Disciple: "Being used to handle hot utensils in the kitchen"
Buddha: "Oh.. I see.. Can you tell me what did they do with the old cloth
they used in Kitchen"
Disciple: "They are being used to wash the floor."
Buddha:" Then, the old rug being used to wash the floor...?"
Disciple: "Master, since they were torn off so much, we could not find any
better use, but to use as a twig in the oil lamp, which is right now lit in
your study room...."

Buddha smiled in contentment and left for his room.

Wednesday, April 08, 2009

Social Media Addiction

Let’s take a look and answer a few tell-tale signs that indicate you are more than likely addicted to social media.

1. You update your facebook whenever you leave the computer, whether you are gone for a minute to get some coffee, or leaving the office for the day.
2. You spend more time conversing with your online friends than you do with your own family.
3. The pictures you take are not for “memories” but rather updating your social networking profiles.
4. When you hear a joke in person, you say “lol” instead of actually laughing out loud.
5. Your social media friend accounts significantly out number your real life friends.
6. You can type faster than you can talk.
7. Social networks are your main point of contact with your friends.
8. You hear direct message “pings” in your head when you are away from the computer.
9. You bought a new cell phone specifically to be more efficient in operating your daily social networking activities when away from your computer.
10. You constantly putting a “@” symbol in front of someone’s name, whether in an email, on a forum, or even writing by hand.
11. You go through withdrawals when you can’t access your favorite social media site as a result of a server down, blocked at work, or no wi-fi connection available.
12. When you meet someone new, you give them a link to your twitter account instead of your phone number/email address.
13. When asked how much time you spend on social media sites each day, you take the actual time spent and divide it by 3…so if you spend 6 hours on it, you tell others it was only 2.
14. You skip a meal in order to spend more uninterrupted time on your favorite social network.
15. For news information you use sites such as digg.com, reddit.com, or twitter search opposed to CNN, foxnews, or the WSJ.
16. You “tweet” while driving.
17. It feels good to be part of something “viral” and to help spread it.
18. You have attended a “tweetup”.
19. While attending the above mentioned “tweetup” you “tweeted” the event to others.
20. If you meet someone in person, you commonly refer to them by their online handle instead of their real name.
21. You don’t view the “fail whale” as a sign to step away from the computer, but instead an opportunity to jump over to another social media site for the time being.
22. You are reading this blog post and nodding your head in agreement.
23. After nodding your head, you decide you are indeed addicted to social media and tweet this post!

Tuesday, April 07, 2009

Humor of the day-Today's tonic for the mind

Teacher: 'What is your name?'
Student: 'Mera naam Suraj Prakash hai.'
Teacher: 'When I ask a question in English, answer it in English.'

Student: 'My name is Sunlight.

Teacher: 'What is your name?'.
Student: 'My name is Beautiful Red Underwear'
Teacher: 'What kind of a name is this? Don't joke tell me the right name'
Student: 'My name is Sunderlal Chadda."

Teacher: What is the full form of maths?

Student: Mentally affected teachers harassing students

Teacher: Now children, if I saw a man beating a donkey and stopped him then what virtue would I be showing?
Student: BROTHERLY LOVE

Teacher: Because of Gandhiji's hard work what do we get on 15th August?
Student: A holiday

Teacher: 'Can anyone give me an example of Coincidence?

Johnny: 'Sir, my mother and father got married on the same day same time.'

Teacher: How old is ur father.
Sunny: As old as I am...
Teacher: How is it possible?

Sunny: He became father only after I was born. (1st Rank)

Teacher: There is a frog, Ship is sinking, potatoes cost Rs3/kg...Then, what is my age?
Student: 32 yrs.
Teacher: How do you know?
Student: Well, my sister is 16 yrs old and she is half mad.

Thursday, April 02, 2009

Difference between Focusing on Problems and Focusing on Solutions

Case 1
When NASA began the launch of astronauts into space, they found out that the pens wouldn't work at zero gravity (ink won't flow down to the writing surface). To solve this problem, it took them one decade and $12 million. They developed a pen that worked at zero gravity, upside down, underwater, in practically any surface including crystal and in a temperature range from below freezing to over 300 degrees C.
And what did the Russians do...?? They used a pencil.

Case 2
One of the most memorable case studies on Japanese management was the case of the empty soapbox, which happened in one of Japan's biggest cosmetics companies. The company received a complaint that a consumer had bought a soapbox that was empty. Immediately the authorities isolated the problem to the assembly! line, which transported all the packaged boxes of soap to the delivery department. For some reason, one soapbox went through the assembly line empty. Management asked its engineers to solve the problem. Post-haste, the engineers worked hard to devise an X-ray machine with high-resolution monitors manned by two people to watch all the soapboxes that passed through the line to make sure they were not empty. No doubt, they worked hard and they worked fast but they spent a whoopee amount to do so.
But when a rank-and-file employee in a small company was posed with the same problem, he did not get into complications of X-rays, etc., but instead came out with another solution. He bought a strong industrial electric fan and pointed it at the assembly line. He switched
the fan on, and as each soapbox passed the fan, it simply blew the empty boxes out of the line.

Moral : Always look for simple solutions.
Devise the simplest possible solution that solves the problems
Always Focus on solutions & not on problems
So the end of the day the thing that really matters is HOW ONE LOOK INTO THE PROBLEM, mere perceptions can solve the tough problems.